Heartache and Blessings

My husband and I were transferred to New York. We dreadfully moved there. We weren't happy about it. But, due to this move, I was diagnosed with cancer that had been overlooked in Georgia. So that was a blessing in disguise. I sat in New York for 3 years, miserable, depressed and lonely. I didn't go anywhere, see anyone. It was dreadful. There was a little pizza parlor down the street and I would occasionally talk with the lady, Carol, that owned it. She kept insisting that I come down and sit with her, and meet her friend Wanda. Finally one evening I did. I met Wanda, her husband and son, as well as her grandson Dean. They were raising him. Dean was 6 months old, and the most adorable little boy I'd ever seen. Wanda and I became great friends. Shortly after that we were sent back to Georgia. Wanda's son and his girlfriend, Dean's parents, were expecting again we had learned before we moved.
A couple months after we moved we recieved a phone call from Wanda. I remember it so well. It was a Saturday. Wanda began to explain that her son and his girlfriend had decided that they can not raise the new baby. She was due in 3 weeks, and they wanted to know if we would adopt the baby. Wanda already had custody of Dean and didn't think they could take care of two infants at this point in their lives, and knew we would keep the door open for them to have a relationship with their grandchild. We were SO EXCITED! It was a boy, and he was coming soon. We chose a name, Colton Jarrett. We rushed to an attorney and tried to hurry and get everything in order. We had nothing for a baby! We were totally unprepared, but we didn't care. The first attorney we spoke with wanted us to relocate the birthmother to Georgia, due to what is called Interstate Compact Committy. For those who do not know what this is.... it's an organization that monitors state to state adoptions. Basically redtape that can prolong the process if not done properly. Well, there is alot of rules to follow, you can't give the birthmother money, you can't even buy her a cheeseburger. We weren't sure how we would pull it off. We talked to another recommended attorney and she started the process for us.
Then the call came... the following Friday.. not even a week later. The baby was born! May 7th. It was mother's Day weekend. Don was already in New York on business. We didn't have paperwork or anything ready, I left a message for the attorney, but I needed to get to New York. Our dear friends Corey and Crystal drove me straight to New York that night. We got there the next morning. We have friends that own a campground in the area and they put us up in a cabin while we got everything in order. The attorney faxed basic custody papers to us so we could atleast have a formal paper in process. Sunday afternoon we picked up Wanda and drove to the hospital. When we got there the birthmother had left, the birthfather had been banned from the maternity ward for starting a fight and our poor baby had no one there.. The nurses walked around with him. They brought him to us and we held him for the first time. What a feeling! It was so incredible! I cried, I remember Don's hands were shaking when he held Cole for the first time. Finally the birthmother came back and we had to track down a Notary so that we could get the documents signed. After hours of searching we finally located someone and they were on their way. The birthfather called while we were sitting there waiting. We could hear him yelling and arguing. He apparently decided he didn't want to give the baby away. We didn't know what to do, we didn't know how to act, what to say. She said she couldn't go through with it. We left the hospital as the Notary was walking in.... drove her and the baby to her mother's house. She stayed there and we then had to drive Wanda and the baby to her house. She wouldn't sign anything and let us take this baby home, but she didn't keep him with her or come to Wanda's with him. We were so confused. We left baffled and heartbroken. Wanda was so sorry. We had no choice we had to leave him behind.
As we drove back to the campground everyone had decorated the cabin with streamers and a bassinet sitting on the porch awaiting our arrival. How hard it was to tell them... we don't have the baby. Everyone just broke down and cried. I stayed there with Don for the next few days, and I called continuously to see how the baby was doing. The birthmother had finally came out and was staying there, but not taking care of "Cole" at all. The birthfather wasn't around at all. It was so frustruating and heartbreaking. But at the end of the week, we drove back to Georgia without our baby.
It was torture. I spoke to Wanda all the time. The baby was not beeing nurtured and it wasn't getting any better. I had to try and let it go, but it was so hard to do.
Five weeks later we recieved a phone call. The "kids" had sat down and talked with Wanda. They decided that they did need to give the baby up for adoption. They signed the paperwork. WOW! Wanda wanted to know how soon we could get there. They had left the baby with her and left. We went right away. Ironically, he was born the weekend of Mother's Day, and we were going to pick him up on my birthday, and the following day was our wedding anniversary. Celebrations all around. We stopped along the way to get diapers, blankets, bottles... our friends at home were trying to get things together for us to come home. We picked up our baby boy and it was incredible! We are so greatful to Wanda and John. What an incredible gift she had given us. We talked about them visiting and our plans for the boys to see eachother as often as possible. We wanted them to have a relationship. We wanted Wanda and John to have a relationship with their grandson.
We took our son, Colton, home to start a new life as a family. What a long emotional ride it was. But the ride has just started. Bumpy as it might be, it was a ride worth taking.